Summer Heat

The heat is starting to get brutal and ugly, just the way I loathe it. I still can't relate to people who love the heat, and yet spend all their time in the air conditioning. Live and let live. We went swimming at the Hanover swimming pool at Storrs pond and had a blast, mainly because we hung out with the M's. Their kids are so nice, and we have a lot of fun with them. N was swimming like a fish, his first time without his vest, so he's now an official swimmer. Great to see, for practical reasons, and also because it's yet another milestone for him. AND, he can have that much more fun, enjoying his time in the water that much more.

A had a big day, as well. She jumped off the diving board after pondering it for the entire day. You could see her mulling it over since her friends were all doing it, and yet she was pensive. Finally, right as we were about to leave, she decided she wanted to do it, and went for it. Then there was no stopping her. I'm proud of both of them for going for it, and making that transition. It's big for kids to feel the thrill of knowing they can do something, especially without mom or dad's help.

The pool is an interesting place to swim. Lots of intense suburban city folks there, or at least some facsimile thereof. It's all so suburban, such a scene. It reminds me so much of going to the pool in Providence, you go to the pool and hang out and socialize. Ditch your kids, get dolled up and see your friends. The kids, meanwhile, are left to their own devices. There are some parents who really want to engage their kids, but a lot can't get rid of them fast enough. Their minds are too wrapped up in some moment in the future that may never come.

Either way, if not for the Ms, we'd never go near the place. It's too angry and intense for us, and we don't drive a nice enough car. That's what it is, it's all so very clubby. Very reminiscent of the Quechee Club. We have several friends who have moved to Hanover and I'm curious to see how they will adjust to their new hip environment. The stuff that dreams were made of? Perhaps.

Until the next time, thanks for reading.

Same as it Ever Was

We had a huge series of dilemmas born out of social interactions over the past few weeks, and for the most part they ended up fine. Once again our reaction was greater than what was warranted, but somehow I can't seem to get away from being a neurotic parent. I know it's me but I can't help but feel this need to protect our kids from the jerks of the world. Unfortunately, in my eyes, everyone is less than stellar.

The hypocritical thing is that all children, including our own, are guilty of the same offense, it's just that you're less inclined to pick it up in your own kids. And that is not to say that your own kids might not be a bit more decent. I'm trying to be objective here.

The way around it is to just lighten up and let kids be kids. They're going to hurt each other and turn on one another, it's just the way of the world. The way of people, and you can't try to shelter your kids from it. It's a part of life and growing up. So I'm trying, and we'll see where this one goes.

I'm still getting the hang of this blogging thing, not sure where it's going to go, because I have so much to say and can't seem to say it.

Had a great 4th of July, still can't say enough about small town life, or at least our small town. I feel lucky to be here, and fortunate for so many things.

BTW, just found out my jerk brother is getting a divorce. I don't know the circumstances but feel like I should try to bridge the gap and re-connect.

Unfounded, But Not Completely

So I spoke in the past about the dilemma we faced with our daughter's friend, who used to be her classmate. She and A have become best friends, but it doesn't seem to be mutual. I don't doubt that she likes A a lot, but her loyalty is questionable and maybe that's to be expected. She goes to school and bonds with the other kids with time.

Anyway, as I mentioned before, she bailed on our daughter big time a few weeks back and it really angered me, but that's what kids do. We watched over her the past two weeks and I was worried that it was all for not, but the kids had fun it was fine enough. I'm hoping they'll stay friends and that we'll see eachother, but it will be different since this kid is farmed out to every taker. Not the parents fault, they work, but it must hard on the kids.

My main concern is in the right setting, said girl will bail out on A again, and A is so wrapped up in this girl. Whenever things are not mutual, it's hard, and I'm thinking that it's inevitable that this girl will hurt A again, at some point. Maybe that's a necessary thing, and we shouldn't worry about it. It's just hard.

Our daughter is not perfect, hardly, but she is a loyal friend, and that loyalty is not always reciprocated.

Overscheduled

I'm struck by how much scheduling goes on with families these days. I'm not sure what it's rooted in, but it seems near universal. Except for one or two families that we know, almost every one of our friends runs themselves ragged with appointments, and several things result from this.

The children tend to be exhausted and pushed to the limit. The parents are frazzled and stressed. And everyone becomes accustomed, or should I say addicted to it. They can't sit still, and need to be constantly entertained.

And they all, without question, complain about it, yet continue along the same vein voluntarily. What is all this rooted in?

Daddy Daycare

So I've been a flake. I know it's bad, I really want to be more diligent, but I think it's all about finding a rhythm. Have been busy trying to freelance, worked hard on two projects that took a lot out of me and have no guarantees to bear fruit, but I had to try. We'll see where it goes.

I'm writing today because I've been experiencing a bit of depression and it has had a lingering effect. Generally the blues don't last long for me, a good nights sleep and I'm good to go, but this one hasn't been so simple. Of course it revolves around our kids. First some background.

We always worry about our kids, and our peace of mind is directly tied into their happiness. I know it sounds ridiculous, but I can't help it. When my kids have a bad day, my day goes down the tubes, as well. When they have a good day, I'm on top of the world. What makes it so hard is that kids are under constant assault by the cruel, hard world of children.

Our daughter has developed a new best friend in one of our neighbor's kid. We are friends with the parents, so it works out well. This friend is a school kid, she goes to the local Waldorf, but she and Audrey share many common friends, and they have fun together.

The parents asked us if we could help watch over their daughter this summer as they both work, and we agreed to some extent given the good relations between the kids. The truth is, I would bend over backwards if it meant our kid's happiness.

The problems that always lingered in our minds is that this friend is way more integrated in the conventional academic world, and this played out this past weekend, where she totally ditched A in favor of a school friend. I was devastated, it really bummed me out because it was like a light switch. Goodbye A, hello friend.

They were jiving so well over the past few weeks, playing all the time, spending so much time together. Our daughter is only seven but we love the idea that she's developing a best friend, though in the back of our minds we should have known this was coming.

The truth is, A's buddy is way more of a conventional kid. She doesn't read, she functions well in large groups of kids, and since she's in school and is heavily scheduled, is probably more reliant on people providing stimulation for her. All trademarks of daycare/regular school kids.

A is way more self-reliant, she can play in her head for hours, she reads books like they were popcorn, and serious chapter books on a middle school level. She creates entire worlds out of nothing that most kids cannot grasp. It sets her apart, and in a group student setting, places her on the fringe.

So here's the situation. We have agreed to watch this girl over the summer. Nothing has been set for the long term. We will watch her this week, and then it's up in the air. The parents need some help, they both work and she needs a place to stay. We are homeschoolers so we are home, though that doesn't make us any less busy.

This girl showed her true colors this past weekend, so naturally I'm not as enthused about having her, especially given the difficulty of watching over multiple kids. Now I know I tend to overreact, things change and isolated moments are exactly that. And I know I shouldn't get too wrapped up in the emotional lives of our kids, but I can't help it.

I'm dreading watching over this kid, but maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised. Or not. Why can't I see these things coming? Maybe that's not what life is all about. And kids need to deal with life's issues, they need to know that it's not all gloss and fun, people can be mean and turn on you.

There are important lessons to be learned. It's just hard to watch it happen.

That's it for now. Stay tuned for more drama. Thanks for reading and take care.

And So Goes The Writing

So I've been trying to establish a writing career with mixed results, but at the very least I'm finding that the freelance writing field is a community that loves what they do. There are all sorts of tricks to the trade, but just breaking in is the first step.

I started out doing freebie stuff on AC and Helium, but found that the key to getting real writing jobs is to branch out. Since that time, I've been doing blogs, of all things, and trying to get gigs, which I'm finding isn't so simple. Suffering from the problem of numbers, here.

At least I'm writing, and I'm enjoying it, though there's a game and art to this in terms of getting exposure and making money, and it's all about selling yourself, something I've got to learn to better do. Some of these guys are pros, I'm envious.

Still trying to find that elusive way to make more money. Where shall it be?

On the home front, things are good. We are gearing up for summer, our Spring activities are winding down and soon they will be none. Always stressing about how to maintain the social lives of our kids. It's fun just hanging around here, but kids need more. Have a few potential things lined up, but we'll see how they pan out.

Until the next time, thanks for reading.

How Do They Do It

For the life of me, I don't know how people write full time and still maintain blogs. It's crazy, if you ask me, but then again, writer's write, therefore they are. I've been blogging on Parenting Squad for the past month and have to confess that I rather like it. It's kind of fun, I like writing the pieces, not too high stress, and the other writers are way cool. They have been immensely helpful and supportive.

I've been averaging about two posts a week, though that's largely because in the first few weeks I literally sat around and did nothing. Guess I wasn't sure if I should have proceeded without having KN (my best friend and lawyer) read the contract. That was what threw me off in the first place, having to sign a contract. Welcome the real world.

My beginnings in the world of freelance were inspired by my desire to be at home with A&N. Nothing takes precedence over being there for them. But how the hell was I going to make more money. My part time gig as Dartmouth helps pay the bills, but it's too damn expensive living up here. I look around at how people live and still can't fathom how they pull it off, but that's another story.

In the meantime, I'd like to reflect a little on the whole genesis of my so-called writing career. I started out doing all the free stuff, thinking that I needed to get some street cred, and let me tell you that there is a world of opportunities to write for free on the web. The simplest is the blog. I have to admit, the writing on a lot of these blogs is very well done. I impressed.

I graduated up to being a content producer and hit sites like Helium and PrintNPost. Though they clearly make money, I have no clue where their income streams come from. On Helium it's easy, they pay practically nothing. They make a big issue of earning through traffic, but it takes an enormous amount of traffic to even make pennies, so much so that it's not even worth thinking about it. You just gotta write for the sake of writing, and my stuff was about average, I got some good reviews and some bad.

I went over to AC, and they actually pay both upfront cash and performance payment. I got the impression that I was in the real world of high-profile writing, so I was intimidated. I didn't want to publish crap, so I worked hard on my first post and gave it my all. Well, it turns out that it wasn't necessary, because some people clearly aren't putting the same effort. Their stuff is complete garbage, with top ten lists about everything under the sun. Not sure how or why they even accept that stuff, but then I learned that using AC on your resume can work against you. I saw ads that said that if it's your only writing experience, then don't bother to apply.

Enough said.

I don't know how AC makes it's money, but it almost seems incestuous. They've created their own internal community of writers who read and traffic all the content, then make phony and disingenuous comments about the stuff. At least that's what I do.

Either way, I still do the AC gig, I like the community, the people are nice and united in the pursuit of better content, but I've been concentrating on my blog gig at Parenting Squad. I haven't seen a penny, and am not sure what sort of income will come from it, but at least I've finally created a resume, and PS is a large part of it.

I've even won a couple of accolade, but won't go into it hear. I'm into my writing gig, and am trying to parlay it into more writing work. We'll see how it goes, but I'm optimistic, if only for the fact that there is so much stuff out there, so many opportunities.

Until the next time, thanks for reading.