Our Complicated Social Life

It’s looking more and more like we’re experiencing this tangled web of friendship, or rather, A is. This time around we are less involved because we realize it’s a part of growing up and we can’t control our kid’s lives, sort of. To be honest, it’s not any one person’s fault, and could be construed as self-induced.

It stems from loyalty and how strongly a kid bonds with her friends. We’re the sort of people who would do anything for a friend. While I admire selflessness, there comes a time when you have to look out a little for your own self interest, dare I say, be a little selfish. Otherwise, people either take advantage or get bored with you. For the record, it’s not the fault of the person in question, it’s more a case of our needing to get a grip.

In the past, this happened with YKW, though I don’t know the complete story on that one. There was something fishy going on there, and that story may unfold one day. The ironic thing is, the re-connection with YKW might prove to be a blessing, and here’s why.

Our current social situation is complicated by the fact that there are age and social circle differences. You can’t fault a kid for wanting to hang with kids her own age and at her school. A year or two is a huge difference when you’re a teenager. I never hung out with kids younger than I was, which is ridiculous when you think about it, but we did ridiculous things when we were young. The issue here is that we need to temper our enthusiasm on our end. I don’t think meanness or deception is involved here, maybe a little subtle manipulation, but what kid isn’t guilty of that? It’s more a situation of taking what’s given to you, and we tend to give.

I think more to the point is that we need to keep a level head when it comes to friends, especially in light of the logistics. I.e., we can’t bend over backwards and sacrifice or compromise our lives in the interest of appeasing someone else. This seems often be the case, and said 3^rd party is more than happy to accept our time and efforts. It happens whenever we cross paths, which thankfully is not all the time. It’s just that when do, everything we do seems to be in the interest of this 3^rd party. Does that make any sense?

No matter, the point is, we have to live our own lives and if we intersect, great, but otherwise we have to live our own lives. With this in mind, it’s good if not ironic that we connected with YKW. We need more balance in our social interactions, because we can’t seem to temper our enthusiasm. It kills me sometimes to see, but again, we can’t control their lives.

Either way, we are not going to intervene, but will do our best to provide alternative opportunities to have fun and make connections. I think the initial results may be positive, but it’s too early to tell. The beautiful, if not amusing, thing is that it may very well involve hockey, of all things. How crazy is that?

Stay tuned for more, because it will only get better from here. Until then, thanks for reading, and thanks Eastop for the pic.