Sometimes I feel like such a jerk, it really bothers me. My thoughtful approach to changing behavior has generally paid off in the past but I still seem to lose it now and then with my kids, and I kick myself for it. Granted, there are plenty of moments when they are asking for it and they push you to the limit, but sometimes, usually under duress, I seem to snap, and then regret it.
I apologize and explain to the kids that I'm not perfect (hardly!) and make mistakes and do things I regret, and of course remind them that we feel so lucky to have them, but at some point, they have to begin feeling it's a bunch of disingenuous BS when you keep repeating patterns of negative behavior.
Maybe it's just inherent in the process of parenthood that we snap when we are wits end, but at some point, if you are not happy with the way things are, you either have to make a change for the better or stop complaining. I don't like it when I get short with the kids, it's usually for small and stupid things, albeit usually under duress, but I am making strides.
In fact, I've found one good way to deal with it is to talk to the kids about when it happens and how you're feeling. I think it helps if they have some understanding that you're not jiving with it, but that could just be me.
Either way, writing about it helps to keep it in my mind and help move towards a better understanding of where it all comes from. In the end, if you really want something and believe in your ability to change for the better, than anything is possible. You've just have to want it bad enough.
Until the next time, thanks for reading.